老杜 [博客] [个人文集] 警告次数: 1
加入时间: 2004/05/16 文章: 3642
经验值: 12583
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作者:老杜 在 寒山小径 发贴, 来自 http://www.hjclub.org
1)
A nun, really needing to go to the bathroom, walked into a neighborhood pub. The place was hopping with music and dancing but every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time after the lights would go out the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom?"
The bartender replied, "I really don't think you should."
"Why not? " the nun asked.
"Well, there is a statue of a naked man in there, and his most private part is covered only by a fig leaf. "
"Nonsense, " said the nun, "I'll just look the other way. "
So the bartender showed the nun the door at the top of the stairs, and she proceeded to the restroom. After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place was hopping with music and dancing again. However, they did stop just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause.
She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?"
"Well, now they know you're one of us, " said the bartender, "would you like a drink?"
"But, I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun.
"You see," laughed the bartender, "every time the fig leaf is lifted on the statue, the lights go out in the whole place. Now, how about that drink??"
2)
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian
woman for several years. One night, during one of their
rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He
would then arrange for child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his
confused wife. Honey, she said, "You received a very strange post card today." "Oh, give it to me." he said. The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card,
turned white and fainted.
On the card was written:
"Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Two with meatballs, one without."
作者:老杜 在 寒山小径 发贴, 来自 http://www.hjclub.org |
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